Tuesday, January 1, 2013

A New Year and a New Beginning for Jack and Jill

So begins a new year.

A very different start to a new year, than last year, to say the least.
We have embraced Domestic Discipline and I don't think we'll ever look back.

I wrote on a blog somewhere, that I truly believe that there would be fewer divorces, if people lived a DD lifestyle.
Those who have embraced this lifestyle are looking for ways to make their marriage/relationship work - and to change the dynamics and roles is a big job - but so worth it!

We had our talk today about how things are going. We looked at our list and added some new goals we want to work on for the next 2 weeks. I am going to need help with these goals, and luckily Daddy Jack will help me to keep me in the right mind-set towards my goal of being a content, submissive wife. Jack has promised to give me light reminders 4 times a week and corner/thinking time, if he feels it's necessary.

On the other hand - I don't understand people who choose this lifestyle and then do everything they can to "break rules", brat, contradict and negotiate. That just doesn't make sense!
We've agreed that the only time I am to be spanked as punishment is if I break any of the 4 D rules. To be honest - I love him, why would I disobey, disrespect, be disloyal or dishonest to the man I love?
If things aren't going to satisfaction - then weekly talks should help. I'm not a mind reader, and neither is Jack, therefore those weekly talks are really, really important. It's the only way to know what each other is needing and to be on the same page.

I'm also looking forward to Jack giving me bedtime curfews - I know my mornings will be so much better, if he makes me go to bed earlier than I usually do. Some might think this is micro-managing, but I consider it a great help. I am a night person living and working at a day job.

Jack will be working on being attentive to my needs and his  new responsibilities as head of the house.

That's about it for now.
Looking forward to a wonderful year!
Jack's Jill


  1. I always think that too. If you're just bragging to get a spanking, just ask for one, lol :)
    Great post!

    1. Thanks Hon.
      Hope you're feeling better after your new years night.

  2. This is an awesome post, Jill, and it warms my heart. You guys are doing an awesome job! btw - elle is right...if ya want on, it's okay to ask...Daddy says it's not unsubmissive, it's asking to show my submission...makes me happy, lol :) Happy New Year & (((hugs)))

  3. We're essentially down to something similar with spanking. If it's meant to be a punishment - and to me it certainly feels like one - why would I want it all the time? DH ensures punishment spankings are NOT fun for me while they're going on. I mean, the whole point is to be taught a lesson, right? Glad to hear you guys are doing well... and Happy New Year!

  4. I don't see it as micromanaging at all, but as help in forming new habits with a little outside incnetive. I admit I need this also.
    And as far as asking for spankings, it is better to do than letting emotions get to the point where bratty takes over. I would rather a spanking to keep emotional balance than to do something (like one of the 4 Ds) that would only have me feeling terrible for my behavior and a discipline spanking on top of that. I'm like you, I don't want to do something that would upset Dave. I love him too much.
    I agree with your comment about less divorces because communication is essential in ttwd, which is why I believe it strengthens marriages so much. A relationship lacking good communication is going to falter and many times fail; ttwd keeps the communication continuously open and free flowing, therefore reducing the chances of failure.
    Happy New Year! Sounds like you both are off to a good start.

    1. Thanks Jacquie!
      I really agree with you.
      My goal is do what ever it takes to make
      our marriage wonderful. That has got to be
      the heart of a DD marriage.

      Happy new year to you and Dave!

  5. Wow....I kinda felt I got kicked in the stomach. Don't get me wrong, I deserve it. We are just starting out, but not spanking yet. If we were I would be getting punishment spankings often. Brice has always been very dominant, but I'm not very good at being submissive. Let's just say we are one of those couples that loves passionately and fights passionately. I do love my husband of 25yrs, with all my heart but life happens. Tonight my 19 yr old is having a party, Brice is out of town, and I didn't tell him because I knew he would say no! She told him and he was not happy. Trust me this has nothing to do with me being spanked. I just seem to find myself in situations that I end up making bad decisions. (or what he thinks are bad desisions) Other times I feel he pushes my buttons to irritate me and yes I say things that are disrespectful. I see my behavior repeat itself in my oldest daughters marriage and it's not pretty. That alone makes me want to change it. I am very much a work in progress, but I do love my husband and my goal is to never break one of the 4D's, but I'm afraid given our dynamic, I'm a lot further behind in this than many of you.

  6. It's micromanaging if you turn it into a game of wanting to be caught and punished. If you use it as a way to help you get started on the right path and then keep you there, it can be a positive and constructive thing.

    Often times, people say they want DD when they really want a role-play or to live out a fantasy. There's nothing wrong with either, but it leads to anger and hurt feelings when DD doesn't live up to those hopes. It's great that you are committing your time each week to talk things out. It's hard, but the rewards are worth it. Good luck!!

    1. Dear Governingana -
      Thank you for your reply.

      As a teacher of language- I don't agree with your definition of micromanagement.
      According to Webster's:
      micro managers monitor and assess every step of a business process and avoid delegation of decisions. Micro managers are usually irritated when a subordinate makes decisions without consulting them, even if the decisions are totally within the subordinate's level of authority.

      This applies to a marriage as well as business. My Jack doesn't need to monitor every chore or thing I do. He does not have to be in charge of all the trivial day-to-day things, because I am just as responsible for getting things done as he is.
      We do not have daily chores and curfews on our common list of punishable offenses - I have asked him to help me with my bedtimes - and he has accepted.

      We use DD to keep communication open; our relationship healthy and free from unwanted bickering, negotiations and contradictions by having a clear definition of what our roles are.

    2. Hm, I may have skipped a few steps ahead without explaining how I got there. Let me back up a bit and try to explain without expecting you to follow my train of thought? :)

      I mean micro-managing in the way you define it, and I wasn't saying that "you" means you, Jack and Jill. I mean the general "you".

      What I've noticed, though, is that sometimes women who want the micromanaging types of HoH are the ones who then turn it into a game. "Give me a rule" and then immediately it's broken or ignored.


    3. Thank you Ana
      Good explanation - I agree.
      I get scared thinking about women who can't make the smallest decisions and get punished for being 5 minutes late or not doing dishes on time.


  7. HI Jill, I love this post. You guys are doing a great job and sounds as though you have some great goals.

    Just between you and me, I can relate to the bedtime curfew. I don't have one but probably should! My blog is full of stories of me getting into trouble by not getting to bed reasonably. I'm a total night owl too :)

    As for bratting - I think maybe it's mostly a consequence of some inconsistency or inaction on the part of the HoH. We need to feel his dominance and for him to be consistent.


    1. Thank you Roz!!
      So many of our "Rules for a Happy Home" are things we've done for years. I always tell Jack where I am or going and he does the same - it's just being considerate, and what if something happened? We'd know where to go to help!